Friday, April 1, 2011

Dear Sam

Dear Sam, this morning, after I fed you and changed your diaper and you peed on me--twice--, I held you in my arms on the rocking chair and you put your head on my shoulder and fell asleep and drooled all down my neck while I sang Vito's Ordination Song to you and prayed for you.

...God of the wind and rain, the ocean and mountains, the mud and clay and sky, the grass and the trees; Creator of heaven and earth, God of the stars and the sun and the moon, God of night and day; you know this child, teach him to know you; you love this child, teach him to love you; be a father to him, you're my father, too...

Dear Sam, having you makes me appreciate who God is, as my father, so much more. To him, I am like a child. Everything I need comes from him... when you fuss and complain and scream because you want your bottle and you want it now, I'm not holding it back from you, it's warming up because I don't want to give it to you cold and I'll put it in your mouth in just a minute... God doesn't hold back from me, he gives me the things I need and the things that are good. Like you. God gives me you. And I am as helpless as you are. But I fuss and complain and whine because I want what I want and I want it now and I worry that I'll never get it and that seems like such a big deal to me.




for more:
http://figment.com/books/45886-Dear-Sam

5 comments:

  1. oh, you're such a great dad.
    sam keeps teaching me about God too.
    like, it feels so amazing when he just wants to cuddle. even when he doesn't really know much about me, or know me that much - the fact that he snuggles into me so determinedly fills my heart to overflowing. and i bet God feels the same way, when we want to be close to Him, even when we can't grasp who He really is ...
    ah, i'm so glad we have such a dear little bear. <3

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  2. I love this!!! I've thought this often, but never put it into such beautiful words. You're lovely. xo

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  3. Janelle, I believe that this is why God has allowed you the priviledge of having Sam! You are so in touch with Him!

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  4. This blog makes me praise God, for giving you to us and for giving you Sam, and for everything He is and everything He gives to us. Keep writing. I love it!

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  5. Dear Patrick,
    I've just enjoyed reading this again. It's really quite beautiful. Love you for being such a good writer but most of all for being you!

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